[ Vanitas' view of the world, despite the ways it's become more complex in his time in Beacon, is still a drastic dichotomy. Anyone that isn't like him must be on the other side. And this world, it seems to have drawn a certain flavor of person. Castiel, to him, is Light. It means he must be a hero. Someday, maybe, he'll come to learn things aren't so simple.
Castiel doesn't reply, so Vanitas drops the conversation. He falls back asleep, so the time injected in their conversation is only told by the timestamp on the tablet.
Even so, he's almost startled by the question when he reads it. Vanitas stares at it for a long time, one thumb resting on the keyboard. Would you have preferred to die? The answer, he knows in the quiet back of his mind, is yes. Fading away into nothing, it's like a far off dream. The peace, of knowing he doesn't have to fight anymore, that nothing would hurt. He wouldn't have to contend with any of these new, confusing, complicated feelings. He could just float away into the gentle embrace of darkness.
But that's a stark contrast to how hard he tried to get away, isn't it? That some of his final thoughts were that he'll come back, probably. ]
cw: suicidal ideation
Castiel doesn't reply, so Vanitas drops the conversation. He falls back asleep, so the time injected in their conversation is only told by the timestamp on the tablet.
Even so, he's almost startled by the question when he reads it. Vanitas stares at it for a long time, one thumb resting on the keyboard. Would you have preferred to die? The answer, he knows in the quiet back of his mind, is yes. Fading away into nothing, it's like a far off dream. The peace, of knowing he doesn't have to fight anymore, that nothing would hurt. He wouldn't have to contend with any of these new, confusing, complicated feelings. He could just float away into the gentle embrace of darkness.
But that's a stark contrast to how hard he tried to get away, isn't it? That some of his final thoughts were that he'll come back, probably. ]
Death isn't so bad.